[`Flash Attention`] Fix flash attention integration (#40002)
* fix flash attention
* i got a stroke reading that comment
* change dropout kwarg back to before
* rename _fa3... as it's used for multiple variants and should work as fallback instead
* simplify imports and support kwargs for fa
* style
* fix comments order
* small fix
* skip kernels test (causes cuda illegal memories w/o cleanup), fix fa test in general esp for models like bart
* style
* allow fullgraph by preloading on init
* make globals "private"
* ci pls be happy
* change skip conditions based on backend flag (indicating missing mask interface)
* move globals support to a function to prepare kwargs
* style
* generalize supported kwargs
* small change to doc
* fix
* add comments
* style
* revert prep during generate
* style
* revert weird style changes
* add fa kwarg prep during generate with fixes back
* how did this even happen
* how
* add comment