Clean cmake infrastructure up (#23527)
Summary:
Only check for cmake dependencies we directly depend on (e.g., hipsparse but not rocsparse)
Use cmake targets for ROCm where possible.
While there, update the docker CI build infrastructure to only pull in packages by name we directly depend on (anticipating the demise of, e.g., miopengemm). I do not anticipate a docker rebuild to be necessary at this stage as the changes are somewhat cosmetic.
Pull Request resolved: https://github.com/pytorch/pytorch/pull/23527
Differential Revision: D16561010
Pulled By: ezyang
fbshipit-source-id: 87cd9d8a15a74caf9baca85a3e840e9d19ad5d9f
