Initial private SDP interface and naive composite impl (#81956)
Adds an initial private API version of the SDP interface.
Signature:
```
_scaled_dot_product_attention(Tensor query, Tensor key, Tensor value, Tensor? attn_mask=None,
float dropout_p=0.0, bool need_attn_weights=True, bool is_causal=False) -> (Tensor, Tensor)
```
Returns a tuple of `(output, attn_weights)`.
Note the following:
* `need_attn_weights`: flag indicating that attention weights should be computed. This is useful to toggle off for flash attention as it does not materialize the weights by default, making it more expensive to return them.
* Boolean attention mask support only; `True` values within `attn_mask` indicate that the element should take part in attention (notably, this is reverse of MHA, which uses `True` to mask *out* values). Mask is optional.
* `is_causal`: Temporary flag indicating whether to use a causal attention weighting. If this is set to `True`, it takes precedent over any value passed in for `attn_mask`. Longer term, the `is_causal` flagging can be subsumed into the `attn_mask` arg via tensor subclassing (see e.g. [CausalTensor](https://github.com/facebookresearch/xformers/blob/sparse_cleanup/xformers/sparse/causal_tensor.py) in xFormers).
* Testing is currently done via reference with the existing Python impl of `F._scaled_dot_product_attention`.
* This PR does not yet drop-in the new SDP anywhere. A future PR can hook it up in BT or MHA.
Pull Request resolved: https://github.com/pytorch/pytorch/pull/81956
Approved by: https://github.com/drisspg, https://github.com/erichan1
